Cruise Lines

If more proof were wanted that smokers are the new pariahs of society, it surely comes in the survey by www.cruises.co.uk, which found that more than two thirds of Brits think smoking should be banned completely from cruise ships.

It's a hard life for those who want to light up - not allowed on flights, in public buildings, maybe not for much longer on cruiseships.

I know we're all supposed to live in fear of passive smoking these days, but personally I am more concerned with not going up in smoke - especially as almost a quarter of those questioned admitted either throwing a cigarette over the side or seeing someone do that.

Are they mad? That's just how a fire started on Star Princess three years ago, resulting in one death.

I'm all for personal freedom but if smokers can't behave responsibly, maybe it is time to call time on the weed. If nothing else, I would like to see a universal ban on smoking in cabins and balconies - not just for safety reasons, but so us holier-than-thou non-smokers don't have to live with the smell of stale smoke.

My stint on Swan Hellenic's Minerva is just about to end, mainly due to other commitments and partly because the guys in head office were concerned that if I stayed on to Kirkwall and we hit bad weather, the ship would not be able to get in to the port.

Result? Minerva would head off to Norway - it's next stop after Scotland - with me on board when I was supposed to be elsewhere.

But they hadn't factored in Captain John Moulds. "I'd have got you in," he told me over dinner yesterday evening, after telling me that bad weather is no obstacle for him when it comes to landing passengers in Antarctica - the most unfriendly climate in the world.

Somehow I really think he would.

Is anyone surprised that Miles Morgan Travel took 100 bookings in 24 hours for its Titanic memorial cruise?

The ship might have sunk 100 years ago, but there can't be anyone in this country - dare I say in the western world? - that does not know, and is not interested in, what happened that fateful night in April 1912. Even the young generation knows thanks to Kate Winslet and Leonardo DiCaprio.

When she heard of the memorial cruise, my 15-year-old daughter asked whether it wasn't a bit gruesome. Well yes. But that's the point. We all love the gory and the gruesome. It's why people go on Jack the Ripper walks in London and why Ground Zero in New York became a huge tourist attraction.

A Titanic cruise that even stops for a memorial service where the ship went down fits the gruesome bill perfectly, but there's more to it than that. Those on board - Miles Morgan has chartered Fred Olsen Cruise Lines' Balmoral for the voyage - will be living history in their own small way.

I expect the other berths to be snapped up in no time, even though the cruise doesn't happen until 2012. A website has been set up with all the details for those who want to book.

Miles says they will be avoiding ice-bergs at all costs. It'll certainly be a good idea to avoid hitting any, but I bet most passengers will be disappointed if they don't see at least one. It would add just enough authenticity.

I'll also bet a few passengers will be sussing out the lifeboat deck as soon as they get on board. Counting seats. Just in case.

Dawn Princess is the latest Princess ship to have been given a makeover. After two weeks in dry dock in Brisbane, Australia, the vessel is now back in service sporting a signature Movies under the Stars screen by the pool and an adults-only Sanctuary.

It's a case of one out, one in for Princess.

Royal Princess checked into a shipyard in Piraeus at the weekend, where it will undergo repairs following the engine room fire on June 18, as the ship was departing from Port Said in Egypt.

No one was hurt in the blaze, but two engines were disabled. That cruise and the June 25 departure were cancelled. The ship is expected to be back in service in time for its next scheduled cruise, departing Venice on July 7.

I do hope the woman deemed responsible for the outbreak of a norovirus-like infection on Fred Olsen's Balmoral last month doesn't read Gene Sloan's Cruise Blog.

Suggestions as to what should happen to her range from sending her the bill for everyone's ruined cruise - the illness spread to more than 100 people and eventually the ship returned to Dover a day early so it could be thoroughly cleaned - to well, sending her the bill. Hit her in the wallet "pour encourager les autres", as the French would say.

It's a strange story in so much as Fred Olsen's marketing director Nigel Lingard has said publically that they identified the cause of the viral outbreak - a woman who came on in Dover. He also told the Scotman she had been spotted "sneaking out" of her cabin when she was supposed to be in quarantine.

It begs the question why she was allowed on the ship if she was unwell. Equally, why whoever saw her "sneak out" did not challenge her, or at least report the situation to the poeple in charge.

But let's leave that one for a moment. It's the comments on Sloan's story that made me smile - the 21st-century equivalent of being hung, drawn and quartered (and so much less messy).

"They should fine her carelessness"

"The inconsiderate b#%& should have to pay for everyone's cruise ... The only way people like this learn is through their wallet."

"A score of lashes and a lusty keelhauling clearly dictated!!! On a more practical tac... send the wench THE BILL!!!!!"

"I hope that this greedy, selfish hag gets a bill from the cruise line for the lost revenue and the additional expenses incurred by the passengers who had to disembark early."

Wonder if Fred will circulate her details to other cruise lines, as insurance companies do when they have identified a fraudster? Either way, I suspect it will be a long time before she dares to show her face on a Fred Olsen ship again!

The Cruise Vessel Safety and Security Act of 2009, requiring more transparency when it comes to reporting cruise ship crime, has been passed by the House of Representatives.

The bill, which will also require peepholes and security latches on cabin doors, and sets a minimum height for ships' railings, now goes to the Senate for a vote.

There are all sorts of other requirements under the bill, including deploying new technology, when it is available, to detect passengers who fall overboard. Fall overboard? You'd have to have really plan well to "fall" overboard from a cruise ship these days.

As I've made my thoughts about this bill known already, I'll leave you instead with some comments in Travel Weekly US.

"With 10% unemployment, foreclosures going through the roof and billions being proposed for forced medical insurance and Congress spends time on this kind of nonsense."

"...there really is nothing much in the bill preventing another sexual assault which appears as [Congresswomen Doris Matsui's] motive for introducing it. So one looks thru the peep hole and sees room service or a cabin steward, unlocks the deadbolt, opens the door and is assaulted by one bad apple out of 100,000 crew members..."

"I daresay more young women have been assaulted at land-based resorts at a much greater rate than on a cruise ship. There's a price tag for all of these "nanny state" laws and the consumer will pay for essentially nothing better than what exists today..."

How ironic that the Centres for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) should report that the incidents of norovirus on ships reached its lowest level for almost 10 years in 2009 just as Fred Olsen was battling with its latest outbreak.

It says there were just 13 outbreaks on ships operating from US ports, down from 34 in 2006, even though more people were cruising.

Somehow I don't think Fred Olsen will take heart from the report. Balmoral and Boudicca were both hit with the vomiting bug during their Christmas and New Year cruises. Cruise Critic says it's the third time in less than a month that passengers have been taken ill on Boudicca.

In a statement, Fred's managing director Mike Rodwell said: "This is just the time of the year when the norovirus, or winter vomiting virus, becomes widespread in the UK, and being highly contagious it can spread very quickly in the confines of a cruise ship."

True. But what about the outbreak on Balmoral in September?  Or the outbreak on Marco Polo in last July? He can't blame winter for either of those.

Rather than make meaningless statements, Fred really does need to do something and fast to get the bug in check.

May I suggest a few lessons from the readers of Cruise.co.uk, writing in response to news of the Boudicca Christmas outbreak.

This from Shelledpea:

"This report says a lot about the customers that FO attracts especially as has been pointed out so few staff are coming down with the virus as opposed to the pax! Maybe a quick guide to hand washing i.e hot water, soap, as hot as you can stand for 1 min minimum like in the food trades! Not the quick flick under a cold tap and then longer under the hand dryer that some people do."

This from PropShaft:

"I do feel that the cruise lines should now send everybody an information sheet with the cruise tickets on virus information and basic passenger hygiene, and what is required of passengers during the cruise. Sterile wipes for wiping door handles etc are a good idea, but when we see someone leaving the toilet without washing hands we should call them back and remind them, that they have forgotten. It's our own safety they put at risk."

Cruise.co.uk readers are in no doubt that the bug pops up time and again on Fred ships because its passengers are all rather elderly.

It's true, they are. But if that has a bearing, either because older people are more prone to illness or because they are less concerned about hygiene, why don't Saga, Swan Hellenic, Voyages of Discovery or Spirit of Adventure get regular outbreaks as well?

Any suggestions gratefully received.